Growing Older and Learning to Love

Hatred.

Something I happen to have a to have a lot of practice at. Something that has enabled pushing others away to be very easy.

But after moving out, living on my own for a little but, and seeing a new perspective on the world, a lot has changed.

Heres one thing that I will remember when I am older, I will listen to my kids. I will make sure that they are comfortable in their home, and if they happen to have someone in their life who treats them like the scum of the earth, I will make sure to do the right thing, protect them with all that I am. I won't give him chances, Because they won't change. I wouldn't spend years and years hoping for a change that will never happen. I would protect my children from depression, even if it meant I had to break my own heart.

But, hatred. Its a Dangerous feeling. One that cause you to change your viewpoint on everything you know. How can one heal this... this ones a toughie.

1- get out of that situation.
2- Remember that you are never alone and that there is this fabulous dude named jesus who loves you even if you are broken, he always has a big bear hug waiting for you.
3- Break down the barriers.
4- embrace the world

I came to Biola and met people from all around the world. People who have problems like I do, and some who don't.

But living here, I have met people that are so amazing, indescribable, strong, respectful, and just beautiful that it takes my breath away and restores my hope in love.

Learning the ropes of love for the first time is just like walking, once you take the first and most difficult step you are on your way to a magnificent adventure.

I love people. I love the way they smile, talk, laugh, hug, everything.

People are beautiful and broken, but being broken just gives us our own stories, stories that others will hear and learn from.

This World is so beautiful, one would be a fool to give in to hatred and miss out on it.

I know this post wasn't very descriptive. I just feel happy.

Hope you day is filled with holiday cheer and cute kitten pictures.

EloraSkye  Love <3

What I Miss the Most

Purdy huh? Thats my home! Well, kinda...

I really do miss it too, mostly family, skiing, riding and the forests. 

But there are a few things that I would give anything to see once more for just a minute or two right now. 

Lets just get this strait, ready?? I HATE L.A.

I dont understand who in their right mind would EVER want to live here! As my mother and I were driving around instead of admiring the views, every other comment was a "Wow.... this place is so....ugly.." Almost made me embarrassed to call this place home for a year. 

Not to mention the fact that going anywhere by yourself is a death sentence (well, at least from how its been described to me), especially if you are a girl. Of course I have to be careful in Alaska too, there are some crazy people in this world. I am just used to the kind of crazy that tries to sell me its mittens while lying drunk on the side of the road. (Just walk away, just walk away...) and so I became accustomed to carrying a knife or three with me at all times. 

But what I really want back? The Security. I always had someone to go to, and a places I could go that I knew better than my own house. I miss the walks alone in the woods, looking for things that were never there, and the sound of absolute silence when I walked outside on a winter night.

I had this spot on the roof I would always go at night when it was dark and snowing, I would sit and watch the stars (My FAVORITE) and sometimes the Northern Lights. Even if I was freezing cold I would stay outside, because the stars are something that makes me utterly and absolutely awestruck. Like true love without the man. 

I truly miss those days when I could ride my bike the 12 miles into dry land swim practice, and playing soccer. By far, the best summer of my life. 

I have some memories that I will never let go of, and places to go along with them. The Pool, Moose Mountain, UAF, lets just say high school was an interesting time. 

I actually miss riding the stupid bus home, I hated that bus. It seemed that everyone who loved to talk rode it, and most of the time I would just stare out the window and wish something exciting would happen, like the one time the Lathrop bus rolled down Chena ridge. 

I hate to admit it, but I even miss those creepy people that dress up like they are spawn of the trees, in california they call them "hipsters"

Nothing against them, I know a few people who can work that look really well, just most people go wayyy overboard. 

One thing I really really miss is giving my terrible step father absolute hell. That was always a good pick me up on a rotten day. Yes, it was me who ate all of the M&M's out of your trail mix you jerk, enjoyyyy...

Maybe this break from the AK was meant to make me realize how much I really love it there. Because I miss it a lot, even the freezing cold. 

Its made me realize that I want to go back. Maybe finish out college at UAF. 

I guess we will see. 

Hope your day smells better than cookies, and shines brighter than a supernova.

Love EloraSkye

Its Been one of THOSE Days

Hey now I know what you are thinking, attractive picture right? Yeaaaa no.

I have a question for you, Ready?

- Have you ever had one of those days where everything just seems to go wrong?-

if your answer is yes, welcome to the life of the average human being.

if you answered no, then I don't like you and you can go away. (just kidding, but seriously, what's wrong with you?)

Anyways, today it seems that every little thing I do somehow either ends up wrong, wrong, or horribly wrong. Not to mention the awkwardness of sitting in class today staring at the back of this girls head, this girl who just plain hates me because I happen to be alive. (don't you just love that?) I asked her if I could borrow some paper and she just rolled her eyes and ignored me.--- Hey lady, Im sorry for my incessant paper requests (once), maybe next time I ask for something I'll give you a gun and you can shoot me in the knee and we can call it even!

fair enough.

She had red hair too, I swear gingers are evil.

But in the spirit of the Holidays heres a recipe for gingerbread:

Anyways, 

Today I was drinking diet coke in the library and it decided to shoot out of my nose the exact moment that the doppleganger dude walked by..... oh joy to the whole freakin world. 

Some other stuff happened, but due to my immense joy for the wonderful memories, I chose to block those out and they shall never again be told to anyone. so sorry for the inconvenience.

Heres to a fabulous Monday and a plethora of rainbows and stuff.

EloraSkye 

My Thoughts on Life at This Point

Here I am, About four months into my first semester of college and quite tired.

First off- That awkward moment when you find the doppleganger of the dude you liked forever. WHAT?? WEIRD.

Transferring from high school was not too horrible a change, but coming to L.A. has been close to unbearable. (Don't get me wrong, I love traveling and new things almost more than anything in the world, but I have never been a huge fan of large cities)

I have missed my friends quite dearly, but have made new ones who I love as well.

I know a lot of people think that once they get into college they will find the perfect partner, settle down and get married. But who on earth could possibly be ready for that?? I still want to travel and see the wonders of the world, sure maybe one day I will settle down, but I still have yet to find a guy willing to travel the world with me as well. besides, I'm only 18, I have a few more years left to wander.

I started off in the Bio Pre Med program at Biola University, I really love science and all, but I have found that is has been very difficult for me to make friends in that field because everyone usually has more homework than social life. Recently, I switched my major over to Photography because I feel like thats the way in which I am supposed to take my life. I am very excited to see where that leads me, hopefully to a job.

I had a sudden urge to make a list of College Pros and Cons:

     
Pros:                                                                      Cons:
Nice people                                                           Most people know others here from before college
Good Food (Biola is known for that)                     Crowded
Beautiful Campus                                                  Alaskans girls don't really fit in with "Cali girls"
Good Enviornment                                                Miss my horse and dog more than imaginable
Nice Weather                                                         No skiing
Away from family issues                                       I want to find a real forest so bad I'm willing to pay


Yea, thats most of it.

I have found a few people that I super love, and they are amazing!!

I have come to discover that college is just like school. except you live there, and eat there, and metaphorically die there a few times.

Sometimes I wonder how people cope with all of these people. Seriously, there are so many of them, sometimes I wonder how we can all share the same air and not die because we breathe so much.

Its gonna become a real life version of the Lorax and we will have to buy fresh air in cans from an ugly midget with horrid hair.

That was my sequence of random thoughts.

Anyways, everything is dandy and I am soon to fall head over heels in love

with my biology book.


like my Mrs. Heimer  poetry class sentence break use? Yea, I miss that woman.

Tata for now pretty people, I hope your day is all giggly and stuff.

Love, EloraSkye

Live out LOUD!!

Light Painting Photography,

Probably one of my favorites.

You never know what your picture could look like.

Rendezvous in our Nation's Capitol

My large post was me wondering hat would happen on my D.C. escapade.
ALOT happened.
But nothing I actually expected.


Our team was assigned to share a bus with another team from Mississippi, at first, I was a little iffy on this. They were from a private Catholic school, and I had convinced myself that they were the kind of people that were too good for us.

But what I quickly learned is that they were beautiful. Their personalities, their differences, everything. The fancy uniform and classy appearance only covered up the true and wonderful people they were underneath.

I avoided them the first day, they seemed to keep to themselves, being boys, having fun. But as the long day drew on, I began to open up, as did they. I talked to a guy, who told me my name was beautiful, one of the nicest things someone has said to me in a long time.

Each one was different in his own way, quiet, shy, hilariously full of himself, amazing sense of humor, random, sweet, incredible.

One held the door for me, several times.

One was by my side for an entire day, gracing me with his amazing personality.

One listened to my entire life story, and was in awe.

One made me smile a bajillion times a day with his humor, despite the fatigue, stress, and differences.


What I learned changed my view on guys. There are men out there who are some of the most amazing people you could ever meet! The twisted, sickly view i have had on them is only from my short experience in Alaska. I am so glad I got the ability to meet these amazing, fantastic, and incredible men.

Chivalry is not dead.

I am her

She unfurls her wings. She speaks her mind. She is a beautiful parcel of boldness and grace, Brilliant. Shining. The more of her own light she allows to shine, The more others shine too. From high up, she imagines they must looke like a constellation. I am her.

D.C. Escapade

Why Lincoln?
Well, let me tell you.

I am in the We The People class, a class that competes over different parts of the Constitution. We re going to get to see many different monuments and even possibly get to compete sitting in the seats of the delegates on Capitol Hill. But that is not why I am writing a new post.

I choose to think on this trip something amazing will happen. Not only do I get to travel around D.C. with some of my closest friends, but I also get to make new ones with a people guys and girls from a different school.

I need a little drama in my life. But not too much, or I may get a headache.

Yes, the thought has passed through my mind that MAYBE I may have weird few days playing "who could look the most but 'care less" with a guy, but that's only because it has been so long since i have had boy drama in my life, that I am beginning to miss it a little.

After my first boyfriend, I fell into a cycle of hatred towards men, my step father and my own father didn't help much. I actually began to recognize that in every paper I ever wrote for my English class, that happened to have a male character, the guy was always brutally murdered, killed, or in one case, stabbed to death by his possessed girl- friend.

I am working on letting the guys live, killing them in stories is something that i don't purposefully do.

Anyways, I am really just hoping that out of all of the girls on the trip, somehow I manage to stand out to someone. Through all the perfect smiles, flirtatious conversations, and skanky clothing, my laid- back, not- so- normal, not perfect personality manages to shine through.

somehow.

Not good enough? I choose to disagree.

Readers; it has come to my attention that there are some problems that we need to address.

First of all, I would like to start off with a status that my friend showed me posted by a fellow high school male-

" Guys look at confidence more than tits or ass, we find girls that don't give a f*** sexy."

First off, I would just like to state how untrue this is. Im sure some men do admire confidence in a woman, but from my personal expiriences, (Multiple step fathers) A woman who is not afraid to show her confidence- is a woman that gets thrown against walls, beaten, and emotionally abused.

And frankly, most high school "men" could care less about a women, and more about the size of her boobs and if she is willing to let herself be taken advantage of.

This brings up yet another important point- why a handful of absolutley beautiful high school girls feel like they are not good enough to be noticed by any sort of guy.
It is so much easier for men to take advantage of the girls who will allow them to, and most guys now days (and even girls too) are too lazy to make an effort to find someone to love them unconditionally, and would rather skrew anything that easy to take advantage of and walks.

Looks are what get most guy's attention, if lucky, a quick glance at the personality of a woman comes after she gives herself away to him- but usually by that time, the guy already moves onto his next subject.

Please understand, I am not making a generalization, there are tons of men out there that are absolutley amazing, who deserve nothing but the best.

but I have been so sickened by the guys in high school- that its hard to really see any of them in a good light.

I have had hockey players flirt with me, just so they can cheat off of my paper. They think its okay, women are easy to take advantage of, right? Well when I told them to back off, they got angry, calling me "an ungrateful slut" behind my back, and continuing to make fun of me for the rest of the semester.

I now have a fear of being in public, shopping is complete hell for me. Too many times have I gone in front of the class and had some guy shout out something like "Nice Ass" or "I'd make you a slut in no time." It is completely and utterly humiliating. I now find myself running from men, being paranoid that they are taking me apart piece by piece with thier minds. I feel disrespected any glance I get, and even when a guy happens to flirt with me, I immediatley assume he is mocking me and take offense.

It kills me to see girls that let guys walk all over them, disprespect them, and treat them like sex toys.

Women are supposed to be a creature of beauty, grace, wisdom, and mystery. It's hard to be that when we get ridiculed and put down for not making sluts of ourselves.

I have a friend who is one of the most beautiful people I know, she could have any guy she wanted. Yet, she does not date. She has respect for herself, and she chooses to wait and not let the disgusting comments and innopropriate behavior towards her break down her wall of confidence; in fact she is mocked for it. Blows to her religion, personality, and anything else a guy can happen to think of that will affect her.

She was even "jokingly" pinned in a corner by two guys, and later told me how disrespected they made her feel.

So, I hope my rant helped to put in perspective, that confidence is seen as a tool to mock women. A tool that broke me down enough to the point that I smashed many of my step father's breakable things, becuase the emotional abuse from him, my anger towards the many wounds I still bear from previous men, and my hatred of hockey players pushed me to a point where I emotionally broke.

But, damn. Smashing all those thing sure felt good.

Where is mine?

Relax.
I know I am only eighteen years old. But seriously, every woman has dreams of being a princess! And I am completely serious, under this confidant man- free skin of mine, I secretly want someone who will sweep me off of my feet. I guess the question is, does he actually exist?

Or are "Happily Ever Afters" just reserved for people who were blessed with nice bodies and good looks?

I sure hope not. But this sinking feeling keeps telling me its true.

What is it in life that so attracts a woman to a man? For me; its pretty obvious...

-The amazing personality
-The strong jawline
-That Handsome smile
-The humor
-The shoulders
-The confidence
-The hair (hehe)


Woman are addicted to a sense of protection, hence the knight, the armor, the sword, and of course the magnificent steed. But do really only the girls gifted with the faces or royalty get to hook men like these?

Ask yourself- are the men who are wearing the shining armor to you... really just losers in tin foil?

Maybe the looks have your heart. But what I have been told, is that the shy guys, the ones that don't try to grab your butt in the hall way, pin you into a corner, grind on you, are in most cases, the true knights. They may not look like much, but they won't disrespect you. Would you rather be with a man who was incredibly handsome, but cheated on you, mistreated you, and lied to you, or would you rather be with a man who may not have the best looks, but loved you unconditionally, was loyal, and made you feel like a princess?

A funny twist to this, is that most guys in the future are going to find themselves asking the same question: She may be beautiful, but does she make me her knight in shining armor?

High School is only the beginning. Guard you heart, you'll be surprised when one day you will find a certain someone, fighting for it.

Class of 2012! (The years we are supposed to remember?)

Hey 2012!
Graduation is coming, and you know what that means.... NO MORE HIGH SCHOOL!
But you already knew that.
Are you ready for the walk down the aisle? Don't trip. God know thats probably going to be me.
Im am so ready to be done with high school.
the drama.
the stinky bathrooms.
the boys.
gosh.

Well, here's to a successful Graduation!!

It's NOT SIMPLE.

Its really quite simple.

                     Not a crush.... well maybe.
I prefer to think of it as an admiration.
Skills, abilities, personality, the whole nine yards.
but why is it so difficult to let it out?
after six and a half years i'd hardly expect myself to be able to keep it a secret.
well, haha at least to him.
Not only do I feel like the world's largest creep,
I've managed to get myself stuck in a position of certain social death.
At least with him.
who is him? why do you care... Lets not focus on names.
If only life could be story book perfect.
Babies could be delivered by storks. Having children would be possible.
Or I could just watch from the tall castle window as the princess rides off with my prince into the sunset.
Ehh, not so bad. At least I got the castle. Freaking good view. Maybe a pool?
No, im not high. Its just 2:01 am and I have no idea what anything means, and i'm prone to drama. (especially after watching the notebook, ahhhh brilliant!!) No doubt i'll regret this post later.
Anyways, how do you tell someone you like them? have liked them, admired.... Whatever.... for six years six months.  without sounding like a complete creeper...... if we met in 2006... then really this would all be riding around 6-6-6.
Fabulous.

I can't wait to move.

This is gonna be one heck of a few months. Wish me luck. or a sudden onset of paralyzing illness... i'd take either at this point.



~Here's to Ben and Jerry, the two best friends a girl could have~

What is Beauty?

Is it the fashion, the makeup, and the flawless smile?

or perhaps the wealth, and fame?

Wrong.

Beauty, is the personality.
if you disagree, look at it like this;
 If you had a person, the most attractive person you have ever seen,  who demanded your heart and had a absolutely sickening personality, BUT, you also had another person who was not attractive at all, but had a sweet personality and wanted your heart the same.

if both of them were asked to sacrifice something for you, which do you think it would be? and would your feelings towards them change?

Its your choice.

Personality is not really held high as a becoming trait in todays society. It seems that physical beauty is all that really matters. But would you rather have people love you for how you look? or who you truly are?

Walk with confidence, be yourself, smile when you meet someone's eyes. Even little things like that can go a lot farther then walking down the street, looking pretty.

one other thing I also found on my search to find the meaning of beauty:

A person who is attractive but lacking in personality will only attract through the things that we don't want people to be drawn to at first sight. (you know what I mean)

A person with personality will attract through their smile, their words and their confidence.

which would you prefer?

~Here's to Greater Personality~

Why do we feel like we have to blend in?

I had a major problem with this my freshman and sophomore year. I did not want to be seen, known, or even looked at really. Freshly awkward out of middle school, I was not aware of the difference high school would most certainly bring.
     But, eventually everything comes to an end, like did my shy personality. It was if something fell off the shelf inside of me, and I suddenly needed a friend.
     So why? why do we need to feel like we cannot stand out?
My theory, is that everyone has that fear, to show thier true self and personality, but most of us do not have the bravery to actually let our light shine.
there are so many people now-days that are so consumed in their outwards appearances that they are afraid to show what is truly on the inside. For some, showing their true personality could be a sign of weakness, or perhaps they may be ashamed of who they are.

I guess what i am trying to say is, do not be afraid to make yourself different, and to let go of the stereotypical wants of society. Wear a crazy outfit, or maybe even do something that you could never see yourself doing.

Tell someone that you love them

I bet that got your attention!

~heres to your beautiful face~

So you want a life of Adventure?

No kidding, so do I. How do we even start? well, let me begin...

A life filled with adventure is really quite easy, see all you have to do is start with a dream. You can do anything, travel, meet new people, be risky, go cliff diving, push yourself until you can't anymore. But you will really only have an adventure if you are willing to live outside your comfort zone.

Imagine the sailors and pirates way back in the day, always headed somewhere, never knowing where they are, nothing but the wind on thier back, and the big blue sea. Imagine the life of pure adventure, not knowing what was next, possibly sword fighting. Who wouldnt want it?

Like Romeo and Juliet, you could have a forbidden romance.

Like Blackbeard, you could be the terror of the seven seas.

Like Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy, you could live out one of the greatest love stories ever known.

Adventure could be anything. To live in one, all you have to do is have the bravery to explore.


here's to Endless Adventures

When Dreams become possibilities

Stop and think for a minute, of a place. This place can be anywhere, anything. This place is where you imagine yourself being, when you are the happiest you could possibly be. This place does not have to be real, but when you imagine having the perfect life, where would you be? What would you be doing? For example, When I see myself, happier than I have even been, the most comfortable feeling ever, I see myself in a garden of white roses, Under trees, but yet sill in the sunlight. Make it even better and add in my crush of way too many years, but we will leave him out for now.
  I dream of this garden almost every night, walking through the grass, and swinging on an old wooden swing tied under a willow tree. My theory to dreams, is that they give us a taste of something that we otherwise would never experience. While we sleep, we have adventures, discover new things about ourselves, and maybe even come face to face with the things we fear the most.
    I choose to think of dreams of an alternate reality, or possibly, the life we live when we are not awake.  It could be real, or it could be our imagination. It could be that our dreams are the only adventures we will ever have. But regardless, a dream is what you choose to make it, what you choose to believe is true, and what you desire the most.

Until next time

Forever Together

That moment when you see an elderly couple, hand in hand, completely in love.

Now that's something to aspire to.

Growing old together, doesnt happen much anymore.

But a realtionship that is able to last over decades, Simply Amazing.

The love and care that went in to maintaining that relationship, Is true love.

Next time you see that elderly couple, just remember what it took for those two,

to truly flourish.

That is a bond of The Truest Love, That can never, ever

be broken.

xoxo

Two in love can make it

Having been through numerous divorces, you dont have much hope for your own future. In fact, since last week i have been pretty depressed about my future. So i realized, I need to let go of the past. Of what my parents decided to do. Because, hanging on to thier mistake only made me hae a greater chance of making the same. But i refuse, Two in love can make it, and i know i will as well.

Someday, I will see this. Romance at its best!

The forever friend

We all have that one friend, thats in our hearts forever, and that we can never forget about.
But I ask, what do we do if this friend is lost?
What if we abuse the friendship?
refuse to talk to them?
and even try to end the friendship?
I true friend stays by your side no matter what.
No matter what you do
or say
they are always there to give you a second chance.
They never give up on you
and always believe the best in you.
It may be scary for some, a relationship that never seems to end. Some people (especially me) have never really seen a relationship work for that matter. Having a friend that is so close, is frightening, and in order to protect themselves, from being left behind sometimes people push that friend away.
Why I am saying this? Because I am guilty as charged.
I am not a good friend
I make alot of mistakes.
The person I pushed away was always there for me
even though i never was for them
ive had countless second chances
and still cannot seem to get it right.
I dont deserve this friend.
I never have.
But the heart, and the dedication, and the perserverance that goes into maintaining a friendship like this, is truly heroic. Something in which i could never be capable of.
People like this friend are the people that should be looked up to
like a modern day superhero
My favorite is spiderman.

Maybe one day I will be able to understand how this amazing person can stand my constant excuses and mistakes.

so the saying goes,

"You never know what you got, until its gone."

Just a little thought for you on you cold march night.

xoxo

The Maid and the Glass Slipper

(I wrote this for english class, but thought i would share. makes you think :)

I am here,

I have been since I can remember.

You have always been my best friend.

You, born three days before me,

we tell each other everything

Our dreams, and our hopes

Anything we can think of.

Except one,

I love you, my dear friend.

But the night I was going to tell you,

you found another.

We were going to run away together,

but instead, you got her glass slipper.

She ran from you,

And I was only there for comfort

You told me she was the one,

You had only just met her.

I listened as you went on and on about this mystery girl

Every second my heart broke,

Its not fair.

I know you better,

You belong with me.

You found her.

How? A shoe fit.

You say you are so happy,

But she doesn’t know you like I do.

You wedding day is perfect,

You always told me you wanted to run away.

Get married on the fly,

No prince or princess.

I stand by the door as she gets ready to walk down the aisle,

to you, my love.

She smirks as she asks me to hold her train,

I do.

   Looking for someone to love, for family, for acceptace, can take you on a journey you will never forget.

Love: fact or fiction?

You see it everywhere
in the halls of school
on a quick stop by the store
Everywhere

Love
Couples holding hands
Lovers looking into each others eyes
An occasional fight
But
nontheless, love it is.

But readers, I question, Is love possible? Is it possible to have a person that you heart longs for so much, that not even the most desired wish could cure the longing that only the sight of a true lover could? My answer to this question: I dont know. I see so many couples, hanging by what seems to be a miserable thread, but then there are others, who seem to have it all. Now, dont get me wrong my friends, i have had my fair share of feelings, for one guy in particular. Its just that, when I see an unhappy couple, I see two people wanting to be apart. Not ever wanting to look upon the other again. This to me is not love.

But now that i have gone on about what love isnt, let me tell you what it is:

-Love is the first cry of a newborn child
-Love is the nervous first kiss under the starlight
-Love is mother, singing lullabys to her five year old son
-Love is the grandfather, telling stories under a makeshift fort in his living room
-Love is the memories shared between father and daughter, long past grown apart
-Love is a second chance
-Love is a mother and daughter, making Christmas cookies together on a snowy day
-Love is hugging your best friend, in the rain, while you say your goodbyes.
-Love is the "i dos" in a hurricane of "i donts"
-Love is the peace, and the chirping birds flying through the sunny afternoon air.

So my readers, love is not the couple holding hands in your high school hall way, take it from a good friend of mine, most likely, they are "in lust". So dont feel left out when you see a person your heart desires, ignoring you, with some one else, perhaps, not aware you exist. Thats not love, and with time, it will pass. For now, be careful of who you give your heart to, what you consider to be love, or want.

Love is fragile like a rose

if you dont water it

it will slowly fade and whither

xoxo

You know it

Its unfortunate that many of us seem weary or sick of high school. Not only has this mass of classrooms, tattered books, and barf- green carpet housed us and helped us to expand our knowledge, but it has given us the ability to possibly be successful in our future lives. But, why do so many seniors just want to leave? do friends matter? Does learning matter?

 My theory is that the longer we spend in this place, the longer we are forced to deal with freshman, sophomores and juniors, the past versions of ourselves. We don't want to look back to where we have been, in we as seniors want to move forward, into adulthood.

 College. Are we really as ready as we feel? Or is that just our brain telling us we want something that we cant have, at least not yet. But if you think about it, college is just a larger version of high school. You just get a dorm and possibly live in a new state.

  Now i would be suggesting that you enjoy our last days of high school, childhood, and parental housing. But i myself cannot wait until the moment the hats are thrown in the air, and all that can be seen is hundreds of seniors hugging, laughing and celebrating the fact that we made it together.

 So, to my followers, all two of them, enjoy what you have here, but don't be afraid to let go of the past in order to embrace the future.

xoxo